Confessions of a Crappy Baker: Blueberry Pie Success!

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I’m not going to lie. I’m a shitty baker. Last time I made cookies from scratch, the fan lights exploded, there was a shower of glass (long story), and that was after I burned the chocolate in the microwave and realized that the vanilla I had bought was actually red food coloring.

I try. I really do. But I’m really bad with simple directions.  Blame it on my mother. I’m a freaking space cadet. I usually zone out, end up mixing the order of when I’m supposed to do what. Tears happen. I curse. I scream. Flour is everywhere. But have I given up on baking? Hell no. Did I eat the cookies that possibly had shards of glass in them? Hell yes.  Give them to a few friends? Oops.

A week ago my friend Rob broke out into hives because he at too many red peppers. So, being the kind lass that I am, I knew I owed him that blueberry pie I’d been promising him.  Thus, armed with a recipe given to me by friend Daniella, (She found it from a blog that I am now completely obsessed with: The Bitten Word), I set to work.

My rent house has a small kitchen, but I managed to make the pie dough with relative ease. I love that this crust calls for a bit of vodka. I smiled as I made it a little more “Texas” by adding that splash of Tito’s (which, as the guys at The Bitten Word rightly assured me, made the crust flaky and perfect).  And, the blueberries that my friend Celine and I had handpicked from Griffin Berry Farm this past May, made a great addition to the fresh taste of this pie. I had to mix two cups of store-bought because we are running low, but in my mind….the blueberries made all the difference.

If you’ve never been to Griffin Berry Farm, you should definitely check it out. I love that place. Ten bucks for a gallon of blueberries. We froze them, and they still tasted great.

The only trouble I had with the pie was cutting out the holes on the top layer of the pie  crust. I didn’t have a biscuit cutter, so I used a shot glass I bought at the Eiffel Tower (How do ya like that mix of trash and class?).  I only had room for four holes instead of six, but I think it still looked pretty nice.

We topped it off with some vanilla ice-cream, and a glass of red wine. Because despite what some say, red wine goes with everything.

Seriously. Check out this recipe. It is so worth it: Best Blueberry Pie with Foolproof Pie Dough!


Published by Ashlynn Ivy

I write, read, and repeat.

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